Hearing the alarm and rolling over with a sigh.
That slow recognition that its morning and I feel like I didn’t sleep at all.
I can hear the familiar sounds of the house and the birds starting to sing.
I feel that heavy body feeling and I sink deeper into my blankets.
This aches. That aches. My eyes are sore.
I just want 5 minutes more.
Just another 5 minutes more.
I don’t want to do it. I don’t want to get up.
I don’t want to face it. Its safe and warm in here.
Why should I get up? Why me? Why is it all down to me?
Just another 5 minutes more. I deserve it.
Guilt. Guilt. and more guilt.
I should what? I should be up and exercising? I should be up making healthy food for my family? I should be cleaning that thing, emptying that other thing and being ‘productive’. Isn’t that what I ‘should’ be doing?
I want to sleep.
I want just another 5 minutes.
I know I will regret this later. But I don’t care.
I want my warm bed. I deserve it. I work hard. I don’t deserve it. I feel guilty. I shouldn’t have watched 3 episodes of that show in a row till late. I should be doing something with this time. Why do I do this to myself? Why do I feel guilty? Why is it all down to me? Why?
I just want to escape. I should book a holiday. Then I will feel better. Yes thats the answer. More escape.
I’ll just lay here thinking about being on that beach, with the sun on my face.
More guilt. I have no time to holiday. I have no time for this. Now I have wasted more time I didn’t have.
I am still tired. Ugh! Who are these people who get up early and are chirpy? What cool-aid did they drink? They are so lucky that they just seem to be happy all the time. I don’t like that they have a perfect life.
That’s it. They are just born lucky. Its in their genetics.
Okay, I am getting up.
Want to change this? Make your own story and talk to me. I am a coach and mentor and my clients take control of their lives and these type of conversations are no longer had.
You have control. You can make a change. YOU can do this.
Take the step. Make the call or read a book. JDFI.
And roll back over and do it all again tomorrow.